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For years I refused to set New Year Resolutions. I set other goals, but purposely avoided doing so at the first of the year. I just didn’t see the point. My friends would make them year after year and forget all about them by February.
This was evidenced by the gym that I went to. I always avoided going in January because it was jam packed. By the end of February it was back to normal. New Year’s Resolutions to me seemed made just to be broken.
I also didn’t see the point of waiting for a New Year to improve your life. I think we should continually be reflecting on our lives and working on becoming better. Why should we do this on a set day of the year?
I still believe it should be a continuous and evolving process. But I have changed my mind on setting them for the New Year. Well, sort of changed my mind.
The first year of our marriage my husband wanted me to sit down with him on New Year’s Eve and set some goals for the year. We had only been married 2 months and I personally thought it was a ridiculous thing to do. Because I wanted to be a supportive wife I reluctantly sat down with him.
We discussed our goals for the next year, what we wanted to accomplish individually and as a couple. We set goals in multiple areas: health, education, professional, spiritual, & fun.
Ryan wrote down the goals in a notebook and I’m pretty sure we forgot about them after that.
The next year I was determined that if we were going to go to the effort of setting the goals then we needed to do a monthly check-in to see if we were accomplishing them or not. I was successful for about 2 months.
The next year was a little better. The year after was even better. The next even better.
Then came 2020! We all know how that went. We sat down the other day to review our goals. Let’s just say we are hoping to do better this year.
So although I’m still not a fan of “New Year’s Resolutions”, I am a huge advocate of setting goals. The New Year is simply a good time to review them, alter them, and replace them with new ones when warrented.
But goal setting and keeping should be an ongoing process. So here is how to successfully keep your New Year’s Resolutions.
Tips to keeping your New Year’s Resolutions:
1. Make them SMART
All goals should be 5 things: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Timely.
Specific
Think about how you are going to achieve your goals? What steps are you going to take to attain them? It’s easy to say you will exercise 3 times a week but much harder to actually do it.
Will you exercise at home or at a gym? Who will watch the kids so you are uninterrupted? Will you exercise at night or in the morning? You are much more likely to achieve your goals if you have made a plan of how to do so.
Measurable
Think about how you will know if you are accomplishing your goal. “Exercising 3 times a week” or “lose 10 pounds” is much more easily measured than “get fit”.
Attainable
Goals shouldn’t be too easy, they are supposed to challenge us. But they shouldn’t be impossible. Make sure you have the resources and capabilities to attain the goals you set.
For example I would never set a goal to be an Olympic marathoner. I know I will never be fast enough, plus I haven’t ran farther than 3 miles in the past 5 years. But I could set a goal to run a marathon. I would have to work hard but I could do it.
Realistic
If you don’t set a realistic goal you will never be able to achieve it. Make sure that you really believe you can achieve your goal and are willing to truly commit.
Not all goals are realistic at all phases of life. For example, I just had my third child two months ago. He was born via c-section and I had to have a hysterectomy. I had MAJOR surgery. I really want to complete another marathon but setting that goal for this year would be entirely unrealistic.
Now is not the time for me to set this particular goal. One, it wouldn’t be wise to rush my recovery (I’m thinking maybe a 10k this year) and two, it is unrealistic for me to think I have the time to actually train this year.
I have an infant, a 2-year-old, and a 4-year-old at home. Not to mention I’m breastfeeding the baby and can only be away from him or the pump for about 3 hours at a time. So definitely not gonna happen this year. And that’s okay!
Timely
Make sure that you set a time frame for accomplishing your goals. Setting a deadline or parameters gives a sense of urgency. Or in other words, you have more motivation to actually DO something.
2. Don’t set too many goals
If you set too many goals it is easy to become overwhelmed and just throw in the towel. Narrow your list of goals down to your top 2 or 3 and focus on those. Then, if you are being successful with those, you can add in another one, then another, and so on.
Start small and build up to bigger!
3. Keep them where you will see them often
Make a list of your goals and keep it where you see it. Place them on the fridge, the bathroom mirror, the front door, etc. Anywhere you are frequently where they will be seen.
I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “out of sight, out of mind.” It’s really easy to get caught up in the busyness of life and before you know it months have passed and you haven’t even thought about the goals.
Keep them visible!
4. Review them regularly
Set a time to review what you have accomplished. That may be daily, weekly, or monthly depending on your goals. Set a standing date and mark it on the calendar in order to remember.
Take the time to evaluate your progress of each goal. Determine if you need to change a goal. Review your plan for accomplishing the goal and alter it where needed.
Frequent and regular assessment of your goals will help you achieve them!
5. Remember that it’s okay to change them
It’s okay to change your goals. Sometimes we set a goal and then life happens. Our desires change, priorities change, we lose the resources we thought we had to help us succeed, or a myriad of other things. There are many reasons to change a goal and you shouldn’t beat yourself up over ANY of them.
My husband and I had a goal of building a house on some land that we had bought. Shortly after setting this goal our son Batman was diagnosed with cancer. I had to quit my full-time job limiting our financial resources, we made the decision for my husband to change jobs for more flexibility with hours, and we moved to a larger city, closer to his medical care and closer to my family. We soon sold the land and the goal of our dream house fell by the wayside, at least for the time being.
We then set new goals that were more in line with our new life.
And you know what, it was okay!!!
Setting goals should be a process of continual review and revision. Life evolves and so do we. Setting SMART goals, not setting too many, looking at them often, and reviewing them frequently will help you to achieve whatever you put your mind to. Just remember, goals can always be changed and sometimes should be.
Now, go set some goals. I would love to here what your goals are for the upcoming year, no matter when you set them!
If you need help keeping your exercise goals check out Top 3 Obstacles to Working out as a Stay at Home Mom: and how to conquer them.